The Best Damn Guacamole

guacamole with lime, cilantro, and spices

BOLD STATEMENT, I know. I don’t even care. I’m throwing it all out there because I need you to know, this IS the best damn guacamole recipe.. ever. I can say this without sounding like I’m totally full of myself because it’s not actually my recipe. It’s my super-chef husband’s recipe. But what’s his is mine, including all intellectual property, so therefore my name is still listed as author on the recipe. I give no Fs. I’m especially giving no Fs because it’s just about the freakin’ THREE DAY weekend and I’m super pumped for Labor Day this year because Andy, my super-chef life partner, has Monday off. We never spend weekends or holidays together because he works in the restaurant world and I work in the corporate world and we basically hang out for 5 minutes/week. We don’t really have anything planned yet, but I’m sure it’s going to involve food!


I’m also excited because a load of this guac is now sitting in my fridge, ready for the long weekend of grilling with friends and late night vino and snacks by the fire. This recipe is actually our go-to for any gathering that involves bringing a dish to pass, so I thought it would be a perfect recipe to share this week.

hand adding green onions to guacamole

This is a really flavorful guacamole recipe – we are not afraid of lime and salt in this family, so prepare for a flavor bomb. The jalapeño is totally optional. I request no spice because I’m lame, but Andy likes it hot [obviously]. This recipe is truly more about the method than the actual ingredients. It takes just a tad more work than simply mixing the ingredients together, but you will be blown away at the flavor difference.

Pull out your mortar and pestle, if you have one, or grab a glass bowl and a spoon.

hand dipping tortilla chip into guacamole

Grinding salt with garlic, cilantro, onion and lime releases the oils, AKA flavor, from the ingredients. The salt is really important for aggregating the ingredients and creating the “paste” that you’re looking for, so this ingredient is essential.  If you happen to come across an inexpensive mortar and pestle – I got mine at TJMaxx for $10 – or if you’re looking for a nice new kitchen gift for your birthday, this is a great tool to have. I really like to keep my kitchen utensils to the bare minimum and only buy what I need, but for someone who lives for guac, this is a must!

[Please don’t mind the fact that I unsuccessfully tried to blur out my hand so you couldn’t tell that I had dipped my finger in the guac]

I make a big batch of this almost weekly because avocados are probably my favorite source of healthy fat. Not only are they so delicious and versatile, they are actually packed with fiber, making them great for digestion and blood sugar control. Did you know one avocado has 10 grams of fiber? That’s crazy!


  • are rich in healthy fats

  • high in fiber

  • increase the absorption of lycopene and beta carotene, two super antioxidants

  • promote heart health

  • are highly anti-inflammatory

  • promote blood sugar regulation

I’m always eating this guacamole:

  • on tacos!

  • on baked nachos made with baked tortilla chips or baked potato chips

  • with eggs and smoked salmon

  • on a sandwich with turkey and bacon – bread or lettuce wrap

  • with guac burgers!

  • with tortilla chips, carrot chips or homemade potato chips

  • as a side or topping anytime I need to round out a meal or snack with a healthy fat!

The Best Damn Guacamole

Author: Megan Kober, RDN, LD

Prep time: 20 mins

Total time: 20 mins

This recipe doesn’t really need explaining. It’s just the best damn guacamole I’ve ever had.


  • 4 garlic cloves, minced

  • 1/2 cup minced green onion

  • 1 1/4 tsp salt

  • 2 c packed cilantro, then finely chopped

  • 2 limes, juiced

  • 4 avocados

  • 1/2 tsp cumin

  • 2 jalapeños, seeded and chopped [optional]


  1. Pull out your mortar & pestle OR a glass bowl with a spoon.

  2. Add minced garlic, green onion, salt, finely chopped cilantro and lime to the mortar or bowl.

  3. Grind ingredients together with the pestle or the back of the spoon. Really GRIND! You want to form a thick paste. This is key! The salt is what really creates the paste, so add a little more, if needed.

  4. Add avocado and mash to desired consistency. I like my guac to be a little on the chunky side.

  5. Add cumin and jalapeño (if adding) and stir well.

  6. Let sit for an hour to let flavors blend, if possible. I understand if it’s not possible.


Love tomato in your guacamole? Add 1 medium tomato for every 2 avocados.

Even if you want to switch up the ingredients a bit, always stick with 1:1 ratio of avocado:garlic. It’s key!

Eat with tortilla chips, carrot chips or homemade baked potato chips for a perfect bedtime snack. Carbs + Fat at before bed = a good nights sleep!

Top eggs, baked nachos, baked potatoes and tacos with guacamole.

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